There Can Be Only One

R.a.n.t. of month March 2016 (Additional)

Once again, March Madness is upon us. And once again, I have no interest in who's playing or who's winning. But that's not going to stop my third annual NCAA Sweet 16 Basketball Breakdown. If you've read my picks in the past, you'll probably already be aware I know next to nothing about basketball "stats or statistics" (As Michael Scott would say). My biggest gripe in the past is being unsure how people can actually fill out a bracket and feel confident in their picks. I know nothing about the teams playing and last year I had three teams in the final four. I still ultimately lost. But perhaps I'll do better this year. Or perhaps you'll be the one mad at me, since I am making a mockery of the whole bracket picks, or whatever it's called. Anyway, enough chatter, it's time for me to decide who I think will advance and why.

Sweet 16
Maryland Terrapins vs. Kansas Jayhawks- Winner: Jayhawks. Not only do they have a jazzier looking Heckle and Jeckle mascot, but a Terrapin is a turtle. Is it not? Come one Maryland! Don't make this so easy for me.

Miami Hurricanes vs. Villanova Wildcats - Winner: Wildcats. My old High School mascot was also the Wildcats, so how could I choose anything else? Especially in the first round? The Hurricanes will most likely blow away or peter out before they hit land.

Duke Blue Devils vs. Oregon Ducks - Winner: Blue Devils. I once had a dream about a weird blue devil like creature. I never knew where that dream came from. Perhaps I had seen this mascot as a child and it scared me. But if it scared me, it's sure to scare a duck.

Texas A&M Aggies vs.  Oklahoma Sooners - Winner: Sooners. When I was a child, we used to play marbles on the playground all the time. My favourites were the aggies, but then a bully wanted them so he beat me up and took them from me. So Aggies have bad memories for me.

Indiana Hoosiers vs. North Carolina Tar Heels - Winner: Tar Heels. I love the colour blue and their logo is blue. That's it. So sue me.

Wisconsin Badgers vs. Notre Dame Fighting Irish - Winner: Badgers. Come on, I live in Wisconsin. Why wouldn't I pick my home state team? Sure, the Fighting Irish are tough, but you don't want to back a Badger into a corner. Trust me.

Iowa State Cyclones vs. Virginia Cavaliers - Winner: Cyclones. You can't truly fight against the forces of nature. Would that apply to Basketball teams as well? I'm not sure, but better to be safe than sorry.

Gonzaga Bulldogs vs. Syracuse Orange  - Winner: Bulldogs. I was attacked by a bulldog, it was vicious and I hated it. I also had an orange soda once. It wasn't the best tasting, but at least it wasn't vicious.



Elite 8
Kansas Jayhawks vs. Villanova Wildcats -Winner: Kansas Jayhawks. Last round I picked the Wildcats because they reminded me of my High School team. But what High School team can rival a College team?

Duke Blue Devils vs. Oklahoma Sooners - Winner: Duke Blue Devils. I'm about to head for the evening. If I don't want that Blue Devil to be in my dreams again. I should probably choose them to win this round. Perhaps I'll finish this in the morning.

North Carolina Tar Heels vs. Wisconsin Badgers - Winner: North Carolina Tar Heels. I was informed that it is bad form to choose your favourite team to win. Because it can jinx their playing. I can certainly see that point. If I were to pick Badgers, then they would all suddenly play horribly. Yep, that makes perfect sense to me.

Iowa State Cyclones vs. Gonzaga Bulldogs - Winner: Gonzaga Bulldogs. I've never had to live through a cyclone, but I have been attacked by a bulldog. Oh right, I mentioned that before, didn't I? Well, I don't think I told you I was attacked by a dog twice in my life. So the reasoning still holds for me.


Final 4
Kansas Jayhawks vs. Duke Blue Devils - Winner: Kansas Jayhawks. Birds are amazing creatures. Sure, I could be threatened in my dreams by the blue devil mascot, but I could also be threatened in real life with a massive amount of birds. It's happened before! Or was that just a film? 
North Carolina Tar Heels vs. Gonzaga Bulldogs - Winner: North Carolina Tar Heels. I said I was only attacked by a dog two times. After that, perhaps the dog gave up the fight. Much like how this battle will likely turn out.

Championship Game
Kansas Jayhawks vs. North Carolina Tar Heels - Winner: Kansas Jayhawks. The court will be all tarred up from those tarheels, which will slow everyone down. Or not. The Jayhawks are birds and can just fly around the court. Wait! Why do I keep confusing he mascots with the actual players? I don't know, I should probably not do that. It's really a stupid way to pick a team. But, it's late and I've made my picks already. I'm not going to change them.