Thursday, July 30, 2009

Failed Children Book Titles

10.) How to Buy Friends and Influence People With Money

9.) Chicken Poop For the Soul

8.) How to Eat Fried Germs

7.) James & the Giant Speech

6.) The Lion, The Witch & Walk-In Closet

5.) The Kraft Velvetan Rabbit

4.) Santiago Chicken Little

3.) Kidney Stone Soup

2.) Horton Takes a Poo

1.) The Little Engine That Thought he Could But Failed Miserably

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

More Haiku's

Lately, I've been into writing haiku's. I think I'm still trying to get the hang of it. For those not familiar, a haiku is comprised of three lines with five syllables in the first line, seven in the second and five in the third.

Here are three recent examples.

I am free falling
No parachute to stop me
Why won't it open.

Lost all of my strength
The day you cut me inside
And left me to die

I am so at peace
Now the struggle is over
Face down in water

Tuesday, July 28, 2009


The Sound of Music
An auditory blessing
Or Julie Andrews.

I gave you my life
And so you became my wife
You replied with strife.

I lost all my weight.
What is my taboo secret?
I used a tapeworm.

When I left this world
You were last thing on my mind
Please don't forget me.

Would you be so kind
At least say you are sorry
When you shoot me dead

I lost all my weight
What is my taboo secret?
Fingers down my throat