Sunday, January 6, 2013

The Alarm Clock

R.a.n.t. of week 01/06/13
♫...then put your little hand in mine. There ain't no hill or mountain we can't climb.♪
Suddenly it's six o'clock and you have to wake up. Or do you? Different people approach the alarm clock in different fashions. Phil, in the movie 'Groundhog Day' took a novel approadch to his alarm clock. He smashed it to bits. Other people do something a little less destructive. This is where the snooze bar comes in. For many, it's the only viable option. I mean how ridiculous would it be to actually wake up when you planned to wake up? Jim Gaffigan joked how the snooze bar encourages people to make the first decision of the day, a poor decision of the day. Suddenly instead of getting up for the gym, you are snoozing. Then bypass the shower in favour of another snooze. He concluded the joke by mentioning how in extreeme cases, a person may even hit the snooze one last time because they've always wondereed what it would be like to be on welfare.

Of course he had a point, hitting snooze is just delaying the inevitable. Yet maybe that could be a good thing. Let's say you are car-pooling and are being picked up by a coworker who just bought a new car. You are about to step in the car when you realize you already stepped in a 'schnauzer surprise'. Now if you had a 'Life Snooze Bar ©', you could hit the snooze bar and step in the 'surprise' after you get out of the car. Avoiding the embarrassment of holding everyone up as you clean your shoe before getting into the car.

Another interesting use of the 'Life Snooze Bar ©' would be when you have some sort of project at home that really needs to get done. You just don't want to do it so you hit the snooze bar and....... hmmmm. Actually I think there is an invention for this sort of thing, it's called procrastination.

I guess another good use would be when you have your heart broken. When you get tired of the pain you are suffering, hit the snooze bar as often as you like till a more convenient time comes along. Till then you can pretend every thing is okay. I guess in a way, video games and TV kind of do that huh?

Well there must be more uses for the 'Life Snooze Bar ©'. I suppose you are probably expecting me to come up with a few more uses. Okay, that's fine. Hmmmmmmm, I uh...... do have more I can mention. They are.... uhhhhhhh



  1. As one who is subjected to another's incessant pressing the snooze, I am more than tempted to purchase a long-handled hammer and effect an environmental improvement!
    (I should add that my alarm clock is in my head- I can wake up at 90, 180, or 270 minutes at will...)

  2. Yea, I'm pretty good at waking up when I need to also. I certainly wake up at the same time every day so the alarm clock in my room is somewhat redundant redundant.

  3. I don't think I should admit how many times I hit the snooze bar most days (because I'm single and no one else has to hear it).... :P

  4. Yes, the snooze bar has less of an effect when you don't have someone to yell at you to, "Get up and stop hitting snooze!!!!"