One of the worst things a person can deal with is depression. Wait, no. I take that back. There is one thing worse than being depressed. It's when you are depressed and Guy Smiley is standing there telling you things are not 'as bad as all that'. It's annoying enough to be depressed, but when someone tells you to 'buck up' or 'look on the bright side of life' it's as if they are telling you, 'you are not trying to be happy', 'it's your own fault you are not happy' or 'maybe if you tried a little harder you'd be happy'. Even if their comment is well intended, the depressed person can take it that way. It's a real struggle to NOT feel that way. Additionally, we each deal with things in different ways. One person may deal with depression better than another, but that same person may be more prone to freaking out when seeing a bug crawl across the kitchen floor. The worse part really isn't that they are telling us to feel a certain way. I mean the depressed person doesn't always want to feel depressed. Who doesn't want to feel happy? But when a shiny happy person is standing over you, and you feel the world is caving in, it can be a bit much. Here you are thinking about something sad and someone walks up with bright smile on their face. "Hey, buck up! Put a smile on your face!" In a way, this sort of thing happens to me at work when I answer the phone. I'll be depressed about something in particular and when someone calls they ask, "How you doing?" Just annoying.
So in protest, I've decided to rewrite the lyrics to the R.E.M. song 'Shiny Happy People'. I hope Charles Winthrop doesn't find out. He hates Weird Al, and he hates it even more when I 'destroy' a song. Hmmm, wonder if this would depress him. "Cheer up!" I'll tell him, as I stroll away whistling.
Dreary Gloomy People
♫ Dreary Gloomy People Crying ♪
♫ Hiding in the house... gloomy... people.
Laying on the ground... crying... trying.
Hear that whimper sound? Dreary.. Woe is me. ♪
♫ Dreary, Gloomy, People in cupped hands.
Dreary, Gloomy People in cupped hands.
Dreary, Gloomy People Crying. ♪
Okay, that's enough, I've made my point. I know most won't fully understand this rant. So be it, I'm not bothered. It's just something I have to deal with from time to time. So for those that have no idea what it's like, enjoy the music videos below. And remember, if you're crying, you're not trying (to be happy). Or so I've been told.
You know, it took me a while to understand that saying something I might consider innocuous to a depressed person, might be very irritating to them. I try to remember not to ask "how are you" when I see them. But it's my go to greeting, since I suffer a little from social anxiety, it's an easy conversation opener. I do understand enough of depressed people, I think, to not offer those little nuggets of wisdom like, 'buck up little camper'..... I certainly wouldn't want to hear that if I was having a really bad day. It doesn't help. I'd BE bucked up if I could, I obviously can't right now!!!
To be fair, most people don't realize how agonizing it is to hear over and over again. Sometimes I feel like replying, "I feel awful, I feel terrible". But I realize the person is trying to be supportive and encouraging, so I don't.
I can understand that. It's nice to hear your perspective. Thanks for sharing it. :) (that wasn't a shiny happy people face, just a regular happy face.) hee hee
You know, it took me a while to understand that saying something I might consider innocuous to a depressed person, might be very irritating to them. I try to remember not to ask "how are you" when I see them. But it's my go to greeting, since I suffer a little from social anxiety, it's an easy conversation opener. I do understand enough of depressed people, I think, to not offer those little nuggets of wisdom like, 'buck up little camper'..... I certainly wouldn't want to hear that if I was having a really bad day. It doesn't help. I'd BE bucked up if I could, I obviously can't right now!!!
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, most people don't realize how agonizing it is to hear over and over again. Sometimes I feel like replying, "I feel awful, I feel terrible". But I realize the person is trying to be supportive and encouraging, so I don't.
DeleteI can understand that. It's nice to hear your perspective. Thanks for sharing it. :) (that wasn't a shiny happy people face, just a regular happy face.) hee hee
DeleteP.S. I love that video! lol (kg)
ReplyDelete