Why is it, I take a month off, and I still can't get any writing done? It's not like I don't want to write, I do. I'm just starting to think blogging is not the problem I have in writing. Neither is having a writer's block. I have the story I'm working on already mapped out. So why is it so hard to find time? Well, I'm not so sure that's the right question. I'm starting to think it's not making the time and sticking to the time I've mapped out. I have a hard time when a friend invites me over, or suggests we do something to tell them I've already got plan. If I tell my friends the reason is because I'm writing, I worry they will not understand I'm ditching them to do something personal. And not just something personal, but something (they think) I can just schedule any time. For the most part, I can't schedule any time. Most week nights are so full of things I need to do, I don't have much time to write. Weekends are better, but that's generally when I'm called upon to go out and do something. I need to get a better handle on this.
Goals and such:
Old Goals:
Find test readers for my story.
So far I have one person expressing interest in my YA story. The next step is now to actually follow through. If anyone else is willing to be a test writer for a YA story, let me know how I can get a hold of you to do so. I will do all I can to return the favour.
Go Blogger-lite:
I failed in this. Well, I didn't fail, but the reason for wanting to go blogger lite (get more writing done) was a failure.
New Goal:
Find a new writing schedule:
I need to find a non-negotiable time, earmarked for writing only.
My Encouragement:
The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?" - Ferris Bueller
Questions to ponder:
Am I doing myself a disservice by not sticking to personal plans?
Have you ever scheduled time to write only to do something else because someone 'requested' you to do something 'fun'?
How do you handle those situations?
I have some family/friends who don't realize how important writing is to me and act as if I'm wasting my time. How can I show them I'm serious?
Signed, Willing Writer
(For fun, give your best Dear Abby response)
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The Insecure Writer's Support Group posts the first Wednesday of every month. Please follow along as my fellow writers and I relate why we feel insecure, or read as we help encourage others suffering from insecurity.
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What time do they usually ask you to do things - evenings? Maybe switch the writing to mornings.
ReplyDeleteIt's a balance between writing and real life...
Working full time and having lots of duties on the weekend means my time is limited. Yes, I should write more in the morning, that just means I need to get up early in the morning. Something I really should be doing. Which also means going to bed early. Something I hate to do.
DeleteThat would be very hard to have friends and family not be supportive or understand your passion for writing. I've found that blogging can distract me from my other writing, so I can relate :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, it is very discouraging to have no one cheer you on or take an interest in what you do. Especially for something so creative. If a person is more into painting or photography or building things, they seem to get more attention. It's something physical a person can look and and understand. Writing, not so much. Which is probably why it's harder for other people to understand the passion of a writer.
DeleteWhat about writing in shorter bursts? Shorter bursts more often? Maybe then you can do both - write and still go out and do things.
ReplyDeleteLike the Bueller quote. :)
Yes, this is a possibility I should look at. Instead of trying to earmark an hour or two session every week. Perhaps a 15 minute session every morning. Then slowly increase to half an hour.
DeleteI encourage finding a healthy balance between friends and work because I think we need to have both outlets.
ReplyDeleteI've known and still know people who don't treat my fiction writing ambitions very seriously. (e.g. Why aren't you published yet?) Usually people like that don't know much about the publishing industry and how it works and what the life of a writer is like. When I encounter someone like that, I quietly tell myself this person doesn't really know what they're talking about, even if they come with good intentions. Hope that helps!
It does help a little. Because it confirms what I generally think too. Most people have good intentions, but don't realize they are saying something offensive. Or are belittling you because you wish to do something personal, they take it as an offence.
DeleteI also struggle with this. But when I tell my family the day before that I'm going to be busy, they know to leave me alone. I think you should just lock yourself in a room and write. Be selfish when it comes to your writing time. The best way to prove them wrong is going after your writing dream no matter what. Wishing you the best.
ReplyDeleteFortunately I live alone, but I come from a large family so my sisters and/or brothers are always asking to do something. I hate turning people away. That's the biggest part of my problem. I do something with one person, then tell someone else no. Suddenly there are hurt feelings.
DeleteI'll test read for you!
ReplyDeleteThat would be awesome. You can get in touch with me at my gmail address: name jeffreysg
DeleteDear Willing Writer,
ReplyDeleteYou know you must be more than willing, don't you? But without support it seems pointless. Not that you need to prove to anyone that you're a writer, but name-dropping is quite effective. "I've got plans with a couple of my writer-friends", "I want to work on a wrinkle my editor pointed out" Non-writer friends and family will soon understand that not only are you serious, but there's more of us out there - rooting for you! Aside from that, keep in mind that you do still need them (for balance). And the next time you're writing and someone asks what you're doing, distractedly reply "Elephant hunting, and you?" Sincerely, Write Along with You :-)
"What aren't we going to do today?" is a galvanizing mantra! It made me gulp - ha! Alex had a good idea on trying to schedule "me time" when friends won't be calling with tempting interruptions.
In the meantime, keep writing. You know you want to ;-) Shoot me an email, I'll lend a hand if I can :-)
Thanks for the 'Dear Abby' response. A little humour sprinkled in with a response works wonders for me, so I think you. Also, it's great advice.
DeleteThanks for the suggestion too about when to schedule 'me time'. Early mornings are a good time.
If you keep plugging away at it, your family will eventually realize how important it is to you. Let's face it, finding time to write can be difficult, especially when the family is calling for you. I have that problem myself sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI've been plugging away at it for 30 years. I'm such a victim to letting things get in the way. Sometimes I think I need to be harder on myself.
DeleteEven if someone didn't ask me to do something that interfered with my writing time I'd still find something on my own I'm sure. That's why I don't bother with taking time off to write and make sure my blog posts keep going up. If I'm going to write I'll do it and I don't need to make special time to do it. I know how I am.
ReplyDeleteBesides, family comes first in my book. Actually rather than say "my book" I'll say "my opinion" since I don't have any book. And that's because I don't write like I should.
Arlee Bird
Tossing It Out
Oh, I do believe family comes first. Especially when it comes to the most important things. But the truth is, there are many times my family does things together and fail to mention to me, so I feel left out. But then again, there are other times when I'm asked to get together for something, usually to go out for ice cream or something like that. Normally it's not a problem and I want to. But then the times I've scheduled something for my writing, I feel bad telling them I've already planned something.
DeleteHi Jeffrey - unfortunately we just need to make the time somehow - I wasn't disciplined last year, when I'd intended to sort things out ... it happens - this year after my hiccup of not doing the A-Z a necessity to step off the bandwagon - things must change. The early bird catches the word comes to mind .. and being disciplined, changing habits ... all the best - Hilary
ReplyDeleteGreat thoughts.
Delete"The early bird catches the word."
I love that.
I would be willing to take a shot at being a test reader for you.
ReplyDeleteIn regards to writing, I usually confine mine to the weekends, although I've been slipping a few weeknights in as well. T.V. is such a vast wasteland of nothingness, that it's pretty easy for me to do weeknights. Plus, I write in short bursts all the time, as it's all that my hands can handle.
Father Nature's Corner
That would be awesome to have a test reader. As a YA story, it's not very long. You can get in touch with me at my gmail email. Name, jeffreysg
DeleteYes, TV is difficult for me too. So much so, that I finally cancelled my cable. Then I discovered Amazon Prime streaming. Sigh.
I can sooooo relate Jeffrey. I can never seem to find the time to sit down and write. I tried getting a special writing space set up (I accomplished that, but I never sit in there and write). I'm like you: I can find a million other things to do instead of writing. I don't know what the answer is. I wish I did. Maybe I should join the IWSG?? I think when it comes to writing, I'm horribly insecure and have truly felt too insecure to join the group! I'm an idiot...
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your writing. We'll figure this out one of these days... :)
Michele at Angels Bark
I've been trying to get a special writing place set up for a couple of months, oddly enough. I haven't even been able to do that.
DeleteMichelle, don't feel insecure about joining! You'll find the entire group a fresh of breath air. Or a breath of fresh air. However that goes. I don't think you'll regret joining. It has truly inspired me to keep working on my writing. Even if I have not been doing a lot of writing, I'm still doing more writing than I have in years past. You would be a welcome addition.
Thanks Jeffrey. I think I'll give it a shot. Thanks for the encouragement...
DeleteIt took me a long time to accept that I had to learn how to say No and more than that, I had to take my writing seriously, because if I didn't no one else would. Along with that I also learned that keeping appointments that I made with myself are top priority, and having the approval of others is not so good when I am feeling miserable about my writing.
ReplyDeleteSo, I hope you find the answers to these same things for you. The best outlined manuscript will not turn into a book until you decide that you are important.
All the best.
Shalom aleichem,
Patricia
My problem too is saying no, but I already ventured into that above. I should look at appointments with myself as viable appointments. Who says I have to tell others what the appointment is. But still, I always feel obligated to tell. Maybe I should not do so any more. That may be the key.
DeleteJeff,
DeleteWe all have to learn how to be our own best friend. That doesn't mean we don't have best friends, but we learn how to say no because we treasure that best friend relationship with ourselves just as much as we treasure our friendships with others. Someone said to me some time ago, Pat, be a gentle friend to yourself. I had not realized that I was very understanding when it came to others, and everyone else's concern was easily made into my concern. I did not even recognize how much empathy I practice toward others, but practice hardly any toward me. I was harder on me than anyone else. So, practice being a friend to yourself. Maybe that will help you say no easier. It helped me. I also learned that it was alright to keep secrets with myself. It also made my saying no easier.
Shalom aleichem,
Patricia
I am big on goal setting and setting very specific writing schedules, so I think it's a great idea. Any good friend will understand that's an important goal for you. However, you know what's best for you, so trust your own gut.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the input. :)
Delete"Why is it, I take a month off, and I still can't get any writing done?" This is what happened to me in April. I took the month off while everyone was doing A to Z, and had hoped that I would write a lot, but I barely wrote because all of these other responsibilities kept popping up. May was the same way. Not much writing because of life getting in the way.
ReplyDeleteI hope June is a much better writing month for us!
So tired of 'life' getting in the way of my writing. The only thing worse than that would be to have no 'life' at all. So to speak.
DeleteIf you get my meaning.
Perhaps if you tell everyone around you starting a month in advance that you're planning to spend the next month locked in your room until you finish (the story/50K/revisions/etc), they'll encourage you and acknowledge you've got a goal and schedule. They'll be less inclined to distract you with invitations and instead look at doing things the month after. Maybe. *shrug* Worth a shot.
ReplyDeleteThis may be worth a shot, at least in the Winter months. Thanks for the suggestion.
DeleteThere is a part of me that says I would love to beta read for you. There is another part of me that knows I don't have time. Camp is coming again. I leave in less than a month. Last year I thought I'd get all this writing done at camp (and a bunch of reading). I didn't get a lick of either one done at camp. So, I know that for the next two months I'm virtually worthless in the reading and writing departments. That's a long time to ask someone to wait on feedback. Plus, I still owe another friend some beta reading. So, sorry, but maybe after you get feedback on this round and are ready for the next round I'll be ready...
ReplyDeleteThanks I'll let you know. Gonna have to work this week on contacting the ones who have said they'd be interested in beta reading.
DeleteDitto, all of it. I'm not afraid of failure - I embrace it, lol.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, I cut back on blogging just to add more writing time, and discovered blogging wasn't eating that much time. I'm not blocked either, I have so many ideas, and do a lot of writing/editing in my head while on the road. Or in the shower. And especially while doing house cleaning. When I sit down to actually write though, something - anything - always needs taken care of. (like a nap)
Good luck getting yourself all sorted out Jeff.
I've found I need to be more active, which is the time I get the best ideas for my stories. Like when I'm running. But agreed, actually getting to what I need to get too can be difficult for some reason.
DeleteIf people, no matter who, do not understand how important writing is to you, you have to find a way to react differently to their attitude. You can't change how they think or believe only your reaction to them. I have often gone out for fu. Over doing something I should have done even when I found it enjoyable. As soon as I felt it was work, I would find an excuse. If you know a certain time for writing is the best for you, I would send an e-mail out to everyone, put your phone on silent mode for that time period and then write. Once they get the letter from you about writing and that you don't answer your phone during that time, they will get the hint. The people who understand ...will understand and the people who don't? If friends get upset and angry, how can they be a true friend ( I am just being honest and a bit blunt...hope you don't mind) and family...they may not get it but that is their choice not yours. I think it will work out in the end.
ReplyDeleteI think needing to put my phone on DND is a good thought. If I place it in airplane mode or put it away, I do seem to get more done.
DeletePS - Feel free to be as blunt as you feel. It's always appreciated and at times something we need to hear.
Too, I think you are correct, I need to find a better way to deal with it because they are not going to change.
Sometimes I swear that the more time you have to write, the less you get done! If you know you have to squeeze it into a busy schedule, you make an effort to do that. If you have all the time in the world, it's easy to procrastinate.
ReplyDeleteYes, that's so true. Somehow I need to find a way to make myself a schedule that I NEED to stick to. Or some kind of a future obligation where I need the edit done at a certain time. I'm so much better under pressure for some reason.
Delete