Sunday, November 16, 2014

Where Do The Socks Go?

R.A.N.T. of week 11/16/14
Why do I feel this is going to be a rant many share? The situation is simple: laundry is done and you are just completing the folding process when you realize there are one too many socks. Or to be more precise, one too few socks. Where did it go? You check the washer, not there. How about the dryer? Empty. Try as you might, you cannot find it. So what's the next step? If you are like me, you throw the sole sock back into the wash and hope next time around it'll find it's missing companion. Have you ever done that? How many times have you tried that with the same sock? After awhile, you begin to realize the sock has gone M.I.A. and you are likely to never see it's mate again. At least not till you throw the remaining one away, then suddenly it comes back. So I figured I'd run a quick poll on twitter to see if anyone else had the same problem and where they figured missing socks go. Like me, most people have assumed the socks have been sucked into a passing black-hole. Very few have suggested the missing sock was still in the dryer. Because really, if it's in the dryer, I'd find it quickly. But no, I almost never recover the misplaced foot clothing. The full results of the poll are shown below, as are the lyrics for a song I wrote. Okay, the song is more a parody, but I still wrote it.

"Where Do The Socks Go"
Lyrics by Jeffrey Scott
- Parody of "What Does the Fox Say"

Pants are clean.
Shirts are dried.
T's are washed.
There's no hide and seek.

Clothes are washed.
And dried too.
Not that you give a hoot.

Sweaters there.
And underwear.
But I wonder now, now now.

There's just one thing,
I do not know.
Where do the socks go?

Okay, that's really all I have. Feel free to continue singing the fox song though. I know you already are.
You're welcome.


  1. Now, just the other day, I realized that my shirt must have been pregnant! It was giving birth to a brown sock. (Yes, it was the one I had "lost" weeks ago. Maybe I should wear more shirts each day to find those missing tubes!)

    1. Yes, I think the majority of my missing socks are stuck inside other clothes. Then, when I'm outside, they make a break for it. It's the only thing that makes sense.

  2. I believe socks are living entities that often migrate to different locations within the walls of their enclosed space, sometimes never to return and other times, to find their way back to their proper places. It is a very frustrating and difficult dilemma for their human owners. I just had one return the other day, which led me to musing about life in general!

    1. Socks are living entities. Maybe we should co-write a book on that? :)